19 Jan The Nigerian Wedding (Part 1)

The average Nigerian will have two weddings: traditional wedding and white wedding. The traditional wedding process depends on what part of Nigeria the bride is from.  Nigeria as we know is very multicultural and the traditional weddings usually favour the bride.

Telling this story from the eastern Nigeria where I am from, once Mr. Lover decides he wants to spend eternity with Miss Omalicha, he does a personal proposal to her and if she accepts, she will then call her family to tell them about Mr. Lover and fix a date for him to  visit the family. I’m sure you are wondering why Mr. Lover hasn’t met his girl’s family until then. Well, a typical Igbo parent expects you to know no man until you are ready to get married. Mr. Lover may also use this opportunity to “ask” for Omalicha’s hand in marriage from her father and extended family as the bended knee proposal to just the girl doesn’t cut it.

Omalicha’s parents will not say yes until they have completed the iju ese rites. Iju ese simply means to enquire about the family background, character and business of the would-be groom. If  they decide that Mr. Lover will make a worthy son-in-law, they will then  give their consent and fix a date for  Mr. Lover  to come and pay dowry.  The dowry depends on the woman’s village constitution. After this comes the Igba Nkwu (Wine carrying) event.

The Igba Nkwu is the big one. The bride and groom would have distributed colourful aso ebis to their family and friends. The colour selection for the aso ebi is usually a big deal. The highlight of the Igba Nkwu event happens when the bride comes out dressed to perfection in professionally tied gele, beautiful wrapper and blouse, escorted by her friends who are also dressed in special aso ebis. The bride goes around saying hello to guests and then settles at the feet of her father (or brother if her father is late) who hands her a horn filled with palm wine with the instruction to hand the wine to her husband. Mr. Lover watches from a corner as Omalicha begins to dramatically look for her husband. Other young men at the event may ask Omalicha to bring the wine to them, an offer that she will politely decline until she finds her husband. As she hands the cup to him, the crowd cheers and Mr. Lover empties the content and replaces it with money as a token of appreciation. He then takes his wife to return the cup to her father who blesses the union. After this, Mr. Lover and Omalicha are considered Man and wife.  Most couples will do the white wedding the next day.

Nigerians are very optimistic people who love to celebrate and when it comes to weddings, they go all out with budgets up to a million dollars. This means good business for the event planners and vendors.

Photo source: Pinterest

Ijeoma Okoli

Emc3 Nigeria